If you have decided not to take PEP, or weren’t able to get it, you may still have some concerns.

If you are unsure if HIV has been passed on, the only way to know this for sure is to take an HIV test. However, you will have to wait until three months after you were at risk until it will be worth while testing. This is because the HIV antibodies (which is what the test actually looks for) can take up to three months to appear in your body.

Also, if you have been at risk from HIV, there is a chance you have been at risk of picking up other STIs as well. These can increase the chances of HIV being passed on and many of these have no symptoms, so only way to know for sure if you have an STI or not is by having a sexual health check-up. You can have this done confidentially at your local sexual health clinic, or you could ask the nurse to do this when you are having your HIV test.

If you have ongoing concerns about HIV risk in your sex life, you might want to think ahead to minimise problems in the future.

‘There weren’t any condoms around…’

Think about the places you are likely to have sex. Many guys place condoms and lube around their home so they’re ready wherever they go. If you are going out and want to be sure, you can always take some condoms and lube with you; they can stay in your coat or jacket pocket until you need them.

‘He looked like he’d have the same HIV status as me...’

Making assumptions based on appearance, where you met, their age, or lifestyle is not always accurate. Many men get HIV because they made an assumption which turned out to be wrong.

‘I didn’t even think about it until it was too late’

If you find yourself in this situation often, there are a few things you might like to think about. Why do you forget condoms? Many men feel that condoms get in the way of intimacy or reduce pleasure. If this is the case, you may need to weigh this up with the possibility that you may pick up or pass on HIV and what impact this would make on your or your partner’s life.

If you still can’t remember condoms, you might like to remember some way to reduce the risks instead.

If you were unable to get PEP in your area and would like to do something about it, click here.

If you think you could benefit from talking to someone in person, CHAPS partner organisations and many local gay men’s health organisations offer one-to-one counselling services.

THT Direct could also give you phone advice or help you find services on 0845 12 21 200.